Saturday, May 30, 2009

Writer's block

I have a writer's block. And it's getting very very annoying. Because I only have 10 days to finish all my schoolwork. And I just have it when I'm in front of a computer. I was okay when I was with dad on the phone, we discussed options for the project (don't ask me what because they have gone too), or when I was out buying groceries.

And I know I can do it, but right now I'm forcing myself and that even blocks the block more. I have done this kind of project before. And I've done it in a few hours too (even though the teacher likes to think that you've worked weeks on it). But those projects you got information from the teacher, and with that info you can put part A together, and you base part B on part A.

I'm starting from scratch. And I think that as soon as I've finished part A, part B will be done in a few hours as always. But just to get that part A done, information is nowhere to be found (not books, not internet). There is some in my head but of course that's locked up in a drawer and my mind has currently lost the key.

So I thought if I just enjoy the sunshine today, the weather is never that good here, so why not enjoy it while it lasts. soon as I'm outside with my book in Princes Gardens, my conscious kicks in You still have to finish that project. Mom and Aunt will be here next Wednesday. You know you won't do anything tomorrow if your date comes over. So then I just walk outside do the necessary shopping and go back inside to stare at a computer screen.

And to think about my date. He's frustrating the hell out of me. He's so amazing when we're together. But it seems like Out of sight, out of mind. He doesn't text if I haven't texted him first, and even that response can take the whole day. This morning he says I'll call or text you after work. was done at 1. It's now 8.5 hours later, still no text or call. I've texted him (of course I'm too impatient to wait) asking how work was and things about tomorrow (because he's supposed to come over). Still nothing.

I don't know why I keep seeing him. He keeps saying he doesn't want to f up. So I tell him he's starting to f up. And I explain why. He seems to get it. But apparently not.

One of my (guy) friends is telling me that I'm overinterperting, like I always do when I'm interested in a guy. He's a guy, most guys are bad at texting. He probably doesn't even notice that you're bugged by it. I know I should just relax. Because I'm going to be gone in 9 weeks anyway.

9 weeks. On one hand side it's only 9 weeks, because I just love Edinburgh and the few friends I have. I like my ritual of going to the gym for lunch.
On the other hand side, can I survive another 9 weeks at work? Sometimes I really wish I hadn't said yes to the extra 6 weeks, but sometimes it's not that bad. And then there's ms evil, she's good underpressure on her own, she gets evil to others if she's underpressure. I know I should say something when she's rude or demanding things, but I can't because if hell breaks loose I'm really not going to survive the last 9 weeks.

Only 9 weeks to go, that means 17 are already done. I feel that I've been here for ages, but at the same time I feel like I've just arrived.

Okay maybe I can do something for school now. (probably not but i'm going to try).

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Wednesday Weirdness

I don't have a lot to tell since I only work and do schoolwork at the moment (or trying to, but end up fixing my computer first and only do schoolwork for 30 min instead of 2 hours :S).

While I was thinking of a nickname for my date (we have another date on Thursday), I thought of my Edi friend, the Duke. Edi friend...Edi friend, ex-edi friend actually.

He got a girlfriend so of course he wasn't texting or emailing as often as he used to. But when he stands you up for a few different dates to go to his girlfriend without leaving a message, you have all the right to get a bit angry. And then he starts accusing me and our other friend that we are claiming that he has to spend more time with us than with his girlfriend. Which is not true, we just want to have one evening after 4 weeks of not seeing or speaking to him and that is even impossible. And he gets angry with us and that we never responded positive towards his relationship, which again isn't true. We're happy that he has found someone. And that we are not seeing things from his perspective. And we were really trying too but when I pointed out that if every one except him is wrong, that maybe we had a point. Well...that started a whole new blow up from his side. To make a long story short, when everything was calmed down, he was ok to still meet me but not the other friend. I was "ok I'll see you and your girlfriend at the movies next week". And he was like she doesn't want to meet you because you've been upsetting me. Sigh. I told him I got that, I was angry too. And that comment started him to blow up yet again. I didn't have reason to be mad. So we parted ways too.

But I was trying to come up with a nickname for my current date, still failing. Hopefully he'll do something that will give him a nickname. I'm going to see him Thursday again, and it's his turn to think of what we're going to do. If you have any tips/ideas for me, let me know. I'm not creative, I'm more from production. Tell me what to do and I'll make it happen, but making that thing up, that's difficult. I do have a livid imagination but that's completely different from thinking of things to do for a date.

One to Wednesday Weirdness.

1.) How easily are you insulted?
I don't know. It really depends what the insult is.

2.) How often do you perform oral sex on your SO?
If I have an SO: I don't know, I don't count. But often enough.

3.) What brand of shoes do you find to be most comfortable?
Euhm....a brand who have shoes who don't have heels? I don't have a specific brand of shoes that I wear. I do want to say that I have pink all stars. :D

4.) What are 3 to 5 items you NEVER leave the house without?
Never never?! Clothes and shoes.
Well...most of the times I will have keys, phone and wallet with me. And a book or music. But often at home I don't have anything on me when I just go out into the streets (neighbours, aunt/uncle/cousins, walking Harvey).

5.) Who did you look up to as you were growing up? Who do you look up to now?
When I was little, to everyone that was taller. :P My parents, and I still do. I know I'm often saying that I want to not be that protective of my kids (or don't give them curfews when they reach a certain age), but I think I would do so many things the same. Just because it worked out for me and my brother.

6.) If you've ever been a strip club of any type, what was one of your most memorable moments?
I've never been to a stripclub but I have loads just around the corner.

7.) Should prostituation be legal? Why or why not?
Why not?

Monday, May 25, 2009

Coming soon....

No, I'm not postponing the story yet again. I was just messing with you guys.

I was home for the weekend and it was amazing. The weather just seemed tropical compared to Edinburgh. The sun is shining here too, but the wind is always present, sigh.

So....the long awaited date story.

I met him at the Sergeant gig a few Saturdays ago. He's a friend of one of my gym instructors, who I ran into at that gig. And we were having fun throughout the whole gig, laughing and dancing. Completely annoying Roomie, I think she saw us as people talking through a movie.

Well...anyway after the gig we were bound by other people so I gave him my phone number. I didn't ask for his, at least this way the ball was in his court. His phone was broken so he asked me if I gave my number to his best friend. Well...why not.

When Roomie and I walk out to go some place else, I saw him smoking. And I was like, nope I'm not returning a text, if I even get one (will he remember his best friend has it?).

I think I already got a text before I even woke up the next morning. And since I sort of promised to have drinks or dinner with him (before I knew he smoked) I felt guilty of not texting back.
So I texted back.

We made plans for Saturday. We were supposed to meet at 4, but somehow that turned into 5.30. We met at a pub and were talking for hours and I really started to like him. We have so much in common. We changed the pub for a restaurant since we needed to get some food, not because we were hungry, just because by the time we would get hungry everything would be closed. I had to choose since he didn't want to f*** things up. While I didn't want to choose because well....I just didn't know where to go. We ended up in a nice little restaurant. And of course we kept talking and laughing. I think we both had a big smile on our faces the whole evening.

After dinner, he paid (well...sort of, the system was down so we paid cash, I had to chip in since he didn't have enough cash on him), we planned to go to his place to see a movie. I know you shouldn't do that on a first date, but we didn't in the end. We ran into his friends. And then (luckily) left them behind, in search for a bus. When the bus didn't show up I made the sensible decision that he should take me home so I could get some sleep and work on my schoolwork on Sunday so that I would have some free time for him during the week.

On Tuesday we planned to meet again. This time at 6, straight after work. Saturday it was postponed for a few hours, in the end we met up at 8. He kept apologising since he wasn't doing a good job of being on time. I told him that it was a good thing I liked him then. We went to see the gym instructor perform at an open mic night. We had great fun and we were home way too late. He told me that if I wanted to go we would go. Well...of course we didn't. And all of a sudden it took him ages to finally leave. I was getting fed up with it. He kept telling me he didn't want to f*** up but he was certainly doing a good job now. And of course he had drunk a pint too many. And then I just started walking home. He didn't know how fast he had to say goodbye to his friends to catch up. We then talked for a few more hours before I noticed the time and that it was way too late for him to catch a bus home and still get enough sleep. So I told him he could stay. He was a real gentleman and behaved himself perfectly.

But then it was time to get up. Of course neither of us wanted to get up, because we only got a few hours of sleep. In the end I even managed to get through the whole day fine. He was completely knackered by the time he got home. He's going to ask the next day off when we meet again (haven't made plans yet), and that's so not fair since I don't have any free days.

We've been texting back and forth. And we both can't wait to see each other again. If his phone wasn't so annoying we would probably have seen each other last Thursday but he never got my text that I had some free time. He never got any texts on Thursday.

So that was the date story. I know it was probably more interesting and exciting if I had told it straight away because of course details leave when you wait to tell the story. So if you want to know things, please leave a comment.

It's going to be another 2.5 weeks before my mom and aunt are coming to visit me. Which means I only have 2.5 weeks to finish everything for school. AAAAAAAAA. I have so much to do. I know I can manage it if I only had a desk. I work so much more effective and efficient if I'm at a desk. I think I'll go for the library and just pay for internet because it will save me in time (and thus frustration).

Saturday, May 23, 2009

surprise visit

I know you all want to hear about my date. And I promise I will tell everything. But you have to be patient for a few more days.

Because: Right now I'm home for the weekend, surprised my mom and only spending time with her.

I'll have date no. 3 Monday evening. Maybe I have time at work to write (I'm always able to read your blogs but it's too suspicious if I'm typing the whole time, my job doesn't require that much typing).

So be patient and enjoy the nice weather I know it must be everywhere. I even wanted to sit outside in my bikini (I know that wouldn't be possible in Edi, but in the Netherlands it luckily is :D).

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Wednesday Weirdness

Right now I'm getting ready for the second date, and I have a few minutes to spare so I'm already answering Wednesday Weirdness. But when this post gets posted, the date is halfway or completely over.

Depending how it goes, I will give full report (I'll probably post about it good or bad). I really like this guy so I don't want to jinx anything.

Ok. Wednesday Weirdness.

1. If your boss says, "I would like to talk to you about your internet usage" what would your first reaction be?
Oh dear.

2. If you SO asks you "Does this make me look fat?" how do you answer?
You look good no matter what.

3. What is one thing that you pay for, but resent having to do so?
I don't really resent having to pay taxes or health insurance, because it's all for your own good. But most of the money goes to the high salaries of ministers, bonusses of CEOs of the health insurance companies. I always hate when they get bonusses that are over a million.

4. A day is being created in honor of you. How should we celebrate it?
Good music, good food, not too much alcohol. I want everyone to be able to remember what they did on my day the next day. And people should just do whatever they want.

5. What CD or Album in your music collection do you secretly enjoy, but would be embarrassed if others heard you grooving to it?
I have no idea. Maybe K3, it's kiddies music, got it for my cousins but they music is just too happy, which can be good on a crappy day.

6. How long do you think you would last if you were a contestant on Survivor?
5 seconds. That's so not for me.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Not telling

I'm not telling anything about my date yesterday, I don't want to jinx it.

My schoolwork is getting on my nerves. I type and type and type, and the end is still not in sight. While the end of my placement period is in 5 weeks. Only 5 weeks!!! And I still have to finish 2 projects. And for 1 project I still have to read the book on the Ocean Methaphor with emic and etic perspectives. And it soooo doesn't look inviting.

I'm going to work on my projects every evening because I'm surprising my mom this weekend by being home. My dad is away for work, brother will probably be at his girlfiend, so my mom will have me. And since I wasn't there for mother's day, this is sort of my present.

Well....hopefully I'm going home this weekend. I booked my ticket online, then they say you have to write down the confirmation number. I didn't do that since I always get an e-mail with the confirmation number within a few hours. But .... you know what's coming.... not this time. And without that number I'm not able to check-in. Blegh, so I have to call the low cost carrier Monday (because to call in the weekend it too extorionate) and hope that they will give me the number. They have all my details, I've already paid, :S.

Friday evening I treated myself to the season finales of Grey's Anatomy and Bones. Argh! August can't come soon enough (well...for the series, otherwise I'm loving life in Edinburgh). And I will get the season finales of Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and 90210 the day after it aired in the States. although I have to force myself to not watch them until next week, so I can first finish my schoolwork. The reward of finishing will be the series season finales, so that will be a big motivator.

That's me.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

The eight things tag

I was tagged by M.E. to do the "eight things"-meme.

Eight things I like:
  • Watching my series: One Tree Hill, Gossip Girl, Bones, Grey's Anatomy
  • Being outside in the sun with a nice temperature (and no wind)
  • spending a day doing nothing after having a busy week(s)
  • ice cream (vanilla or chocolate)
  • spending time with friends
  • the gym/my classes (of Body combat): it's the satisfaction of actually working out
  • reading books
  • watching movies

Eight things I did yesterday:
  • Work
  • Pilates class
  • Discussing my gym account with the Gym manager (You're not allowed to pay cash anymore and if I would change my membership I would have to sign up for a minimum of 6 months, but I'm only here for another 2)
  • Wednesday Weirdness
  • Read the blogs on my bloglist
  • went to the pub with roomie
  • agreed to go to Star Trek next Wednesday (Wednesday are 2 for 1, so you can actually afford the cinema then)
  • Had my daily dose of phone calls (my mom and my friend)

Eight things I wish I could do:
  • live without a care in the world
  • enjoy the little things in life more
  • fly
  • speak more languages
  • find out what I want in life, like what I want to do for a living
  • be not so nice/be more assertive
  • fastread, that would make all my schoolbooks so much more interesting if i could finish them in half time.
  • be more disciplined about getting into shape.

Eight things I don't like:
  • Ms Evil (can't tell that story until after I leave Edinburgh in case stumbles upon this page in my history list)
  • my school projects
  • my teachers (if you would want the answer to What is 1+1? they will answer with an apple is not a pear, or even with something even more ridiculous)
  • the wind. It's making the sun only enjoyable behind glass
  • the upper management of my gym (instead of paying 25 pound cash per month for the next two months I can only stay at my gym if I pay 40 pound cash per month for the next two months. that's the only solution they can come up with. Otherwise i would have to sign up for half a year and still pay 40 pound a month)
  • my snacking habits
  • people standing me up (my friend was supposed to pick me up an hour ago, he's still not there and not responding on his phone, hopefully everything is ok)
  • and I could go on and on about things I don't like

And I'm tagging who hasn't yet been tagged with this meme. So leave a message if you're picking up this tag.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Wednesday Weirdness

There's not really much going on in my life right now. Yes I do have a date but that won't be until this weekend. So I will update you about that in the weekend.

Right now I'll do the Wednesday ritual: Wednesday Weirdness

1.) What are your least favorite sounds?
Didn't we have this question a few Wednesdays ago? Or was it with a different meme? least favorite sounds are of course alarms (alarms which let you know that something's wrong/bad). But other than that, the sound at the train station announcing that my train is delayed, yet again.

2.) Do you enjoy reading infidelity blogs? Why? If you don't, is there any reason why you don't?
I don't read them because I haven't stumbled upon a good one yet. So if you have recommendations, let a comment.

3.) If you could make one frivolous purchase right now without expense being an option, what one thing would you go buy?
A house? Completely with furniture and all. Placed anywhere in the world. Like if I want to live back home, the house would be back home. But since I'm in Ediniburgh now, it should be in Edinburgh. But then again that's not a frivolous purchase, that's a dream purchase since it can't actually happen.

4.) Have you ever gotten drunk and then gotten behind the wheel to drive?
Nope I've never been drunk. I don't drink when I have to drive. And I don't get into a car when the driver has been drinking.

5.) As an adult, have you ever been caught having sex by someone you didn't ever want to catch you in the act?
Nope, luckily not.

6.) If your current significant other wound up in jail for no less than 5 years but didn't kill or physically harm anyone, would you wait for them or move on?
That would totally depend on the situation. And of course how strong our relationship is. If we've only been dating for a few months it would be different than we've been dating for years.

7.) If you had to participate, would you rather be in a mud wrestling competition or a JellO wrestling competition?
Mud is good for your skin. And JellO is sticky.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Weirdness on Thursday

I know Weirdness related stuff belongs to Wednesdays. But I saw the weirdest thing today.

I am walking home from work. Most people who are out in the streets are in suits and also on their way home. Then the following happens:

A greyish business man (I would say around his 50s) in a very very neat suit walking in my direction with an large unidentified object in his hands. While I'm trying to figure out what the bleep he is carrying, he puts it on the floor and jumps onto it. The it was a skateboard.

You would love the looks on peoples faces (including mine) as we realised a greyish man in a suit was skateboarding. *Gasp* and follow the "dude" on the skateboard.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Wednesday Weirdness

Wednesdays don't need an introduction. Here's Wednesday Weirdness:

1.) Name 3 people in history whom you would invite to a dinner party?
Isn't this a question you have to answer on your college applications in the States?
I have no idea who I would invite. Maybe some old actors/actresses whose movies I love but even then, why would I invite them? I'd rather have my friends over for dinner. Because at least you can be yourself. If you have 'important' people over you have to really watch what you're saying.

2.) Are there any conspiracy theories that you believe could be true?
Nah. I do love Hodgins conspiracy theories in the serie Bones.

3.) What's a weapon that you feel suits your personality?
Not really. Only a superpower weapon, like being able to shoot fire with my eyes. Then looks can really kill :P.

4.) If you had to let someone off of a cooking show prepare a meal for you and your family, who would you pick and why?
Jamie Oliver. His food always looks delicious (don't know if it tastes delicious too). Gordon Ramsay curses too much for my liking. And well...that's the famous cooking show cooks I can think of right now.

5.) What brand of sliced sandwich bread do you buy most often?
Wartons Wholemeal. Just because they have the thin sliced bread. All other brands (and even within Wartons other breads), their slices are too thick.

6.) How often do you try new things in bed?
I'm still trying the new thing: sleeping a night without waking up. That would be so amazing.
As soon as I have a new lover I will try other/new things in bed.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009


I hereby declare that I want the responsibilities of a 6 year old back.
I officially resign from being an adult!
Because I would like to:

- go to MacDonalds and think that it's a 4 star restaurant
- if I lose a tooth, put it underneath my pillow and find money the next day instead.
- play with paper boats in a puddle and make ports/docks of stones.
- believe that you could better have M&Ms than money, because you can eat M&Ms.
- believe that Santa Claus really exists and that you always get presents, even if you have been naughty.
- lay in grass and look at the clouds, and sell lemonade on a hot Summer day.
- point at crazy people and laugh about them out loud with my friends.
- believe that mom and dad know EVERYTHING and have a solution for everything.
- go back to the time that all you knew were colours, the table of 1 to 10, and children songs. And that was enough since you didn't know any better and you didn't care.
- know how to be happy, happily ignorant of all things that could make you worry or break your happy-mode.
- believe that anything is possible; ignorant about how complicated life is and happy because of the small things.
- believe in the power of a smile, hugs, kind word, truth, honesty, peace, dreams, imagination and making snowmen.

I want to go back to the simple life.
I don't want my life to exist of computer crahses, work pressure, loads op paperwork, always trying to make ends meet, bills, insurances, taxes, gossip, illnesses and the loss of loved ones. is my bank card, my credit card, my mobile phone, car keys, and my resume.
I officially distance myself from adulthood.

And if you need to have a talk, you first have see how to catch me because...... TAG! You're it!!!!

Saturday, May 02, 2009

better safe than sorry

So my family arrived at midnight on Wednesday. They decided just to come and visit me, since Airport Weeze and Germany would have final answers on Wednesday. Well...there was no decision made that day, they were going to discuss it Friday. Not good.

Thursday I had to work and in the afternoon I called Ryanair to find out more about the flight on Saturday (or well...on the decision of the Germans, since all flights would be cancelled from 2 May onwards). Nothing. At the end of the day my dad wanted to book tickets for the Friday. Since he, brother and his girlfriend all had to work this Sunday. You'd rather have tickets then find out on Friday afternoon that the flight is cancelled and you just were too late with booking the tickets.

I had the day off on Friday so we were exploring Edinburgh and not stuck to a computer to check the flight.

Well...on Friday at 6pm we still didn't know anything. I had checked the websites of Ryanair and Airport Weeze, called them both too but of course no one knew anything. And since you'd rather be safe than sorry, we took the bus to the airport. At the airport again no one knew anything. It was already 7pm on a Friday at that time. How is it possible that no one knows anything? It's not like those people are going to discuss stuff on a Saturday, they are the Monday to Friday 9 to 5 people. They don't do Saturdays.
But anyway I put them on the flight and went back home. When I got home I checked the internet again. still did not know anything. On Airport Weeze the banner that decorated the homepage for the last week was gone, but no info. So back to Ryanair to see if I could book tickets home again. And guess what? I could. Sigh so my parents could have stayed.
But since I wanted to know what was decided (maybe they decided no and then Ryanair had 10 days to inform and arrange alternative things). So I went back to the Airport Weeze, since I have the ability to read German (I can understand half of the spoken German but I'm unable to say anything back, although a crash course would probably be enough to speak it fluent again) I just stayed on the German site (normally I click English or Dutch). And guess what? There was a press release saying that Ryanair could go back to business as usual. And it was confirmed by Ryanair. So to Ryanair I went, nothing. But then I changed to German, and there it was.
Jeez! Most people who fly to Weeze are not German. It should just be on the home page of all languages flights to Weeze continue as scheduled. It's not like that is difficult to do. They are able to change their sales every day and that requires way more technology and stuff.

But at least my friends can still come and visit me. Well...don't know if they are coming to visit me but if they want to, it is affordable again.